Choose Your Alliances Wisely

It is important to think about who or what it is that you would like as your main alliance.

Who are you aligned with?

Everyone has alliances. Alliances are to do with silent agreements that we have with someone or something. These are the people or things that you turn towards in order to figure things out, send your time with and agree with when there are conflicts.

It can be with: work, parents, spouse, ex-spouse, child or children, sports activities, food, friends lover, etc.

If you have a partner/spouse then that relationship should be your first and foremost alliance above all others and if this alliance is not maintained then the relationship will be undermined and eventually disintegrate.

  1. It is important to remember that you will have different interests and that’s ok and normal.
  2. There is always a broader goal underlying every issue because you will have different interests. It is important to identify what that is in order to stay aligned.
  3. It is important to discuss these differences and not avoid the conflict because conflict is clarity and allows for the compromises and agreements to be made to support the alliance.
  4. Remember that it is always about supporting your #1 alliance first and foremost and once you have that agreement, only then can you include others in the discussion.
  5. Remember that it is always about the follow through on the agreement that says to the other person that they do have an alliance with them. If you don’t truly agree, then you won’t follow through and once that happens there is no alliance.
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